becoming an illusion

I sat there for years

being real
while you became an illusion

I kept my windows shuttered
locked and barred and under cover
while excusing your every intrusion.

I stayed there deficient and wishing
ignoring the light and the warmth I was missing
while you stood there

a welcome delusion.

I sat there for years 

beneath your inhibitions
smiling and seething

supporting your mission.

I stood there immobile and static
Stuck to your web of fictitious fabric.

I was standing there waiting to feel less subdued
while you lingered 

unseen and untrue.